


wanna fall into you deeper

by flow3rs



Series: you were mine for the summer (now we know its nearly over) [3]
Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: Beaches, Boys Kissing, EJ Caswell In A Crop Top, Family Dinners, Family Issues, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Ice Cream, M/M, Meeting the Parents, Popsicles, Summer Love, You're Welcome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:54:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26337568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flow3rs/pseuds/flow3rs
Summary: ej hadn’t come to the shop since the excursion and yeah ricky didn’t work yesterday so maybe he did come and ricky just wasn’t around to see. but that would imply that ej actually came to the shop for the ice cream and not just to piss ricky off with his flirting. and for some reason that thought disappointed ricky.orricky sucks at mini golf, ej wears a crop top, and mike bowen is the best at embarrassing his son.
Relationships: Ricky Bowen/E.J. Caswell
Series: you were mine for the summer (now we know its nearly over) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1890310
Comments: 19
Kudos: 61





	wanna fall into you deeper

**Author's Note:**

> i did not mean for this to be 7000 words and yet,,,here we are. theres hella plot in this that will be important for later installments of this series so pay attention hehe.
> 
> im so happy to finally be posting this so that i dont have to keep looking at that Certain Fic that has been at the top of the RJ tag in recent days lkjfsljdf lets just say that it was disturbing and i needed some time to reel from the trauma of reading it for a few days.
> 
> shoutout to the rj clowns ([ichorborn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ichorborn/pseuds/ichorborn), [finding](https://archiveofourown.org/users/finding/pseuds/finding), [TheKeyOfHappiness](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheKeyOfHappiness/pseuds/TheKeyOfHappiness)) for keeping me motivated to write and for being my comic relief mwah luv yall xx
> 
> title from 'deep end' by jaden (STREAM CTVV3 YOU COWARDS!)

“You and EJ did _what?!?!!_ ” Big Red screamed in shock, mini golf putter flying out of his hand as he swung. He didn’t even hit the ball.

Ricky’s eyes widened as the club landed with a splash in the small pond a few feet away and Carlos cringed as they watched it sink to the bottom.

“If you think I am getting that out of there, you are wrong, Reddington!” Kourtney yelled from her place at the small yellow, castle shaped booth, cheek resting on her hand as she shook her head at the boy.

Cape May was a shitty town with shitty people, but the few people who weren’t shitty...were still shitty at mini golf.

The group was at Dragon’s Lair, a Medieval themed miniature golf course in the heart of town that consisted of horribly built castles, terrifying animatronic Dragons, and grey-green pond water that probably hadn’t been replaced since 1996. It also happened to be where Kourtney was employed, meaning they had the luxury of playing for free. (Not that any of them couldn’t afford the $5 ticket, but free shit was free shit and free shit made you feel special).

“Yeah, yeah,” Big Red grumbled, toeing his shoes off, rolling up the bottom of his khakis to his knees, and hopping in the shallow pond. He waded through the lily pads and small dragon statues in the water, hands on his hips as he searched for the golf club in the murky water.

“Okay, _back_ to what you were saying Ricky,” Carlos piped up, rolling his eyes as he got into position to hit the ball into the next hole. “You and EJ _hooked up_ , you say? Quite scandalous, if i do say so myself. And a little surprising coming from you of all people.”

Carlos hit the ball, watching for the fateful few seconds until it landed in the hole perfectly.

Ricky’s eyebrows creased and he pouted as he lined himself up for his own turn at hitting the ball. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“If you want me to be honest: he means you’re a stuck up, prideful, up-tight, reclusive introvert who only leaves his house to serve ice cream and when we force him to hang out with us!” Kourtney shouted from the booth she was sat in, hands around her mouth to project her voice.

“ _Excuse me?!?!_ ”

Big Red sighed from his place wading through the pond. “To be nice: what she means is that none of us expected you to even have the energy to be here right now, let alone have the energy to actually admit to yourself that you have the hots for EJ and hook up with him.”

“And on the _beach_ . In _public_ ,” Carlos whispered, scandalized. “Here comes Ricky, always proving that I’m not even the main character in my own life.”

Ricky blushed, looking away from his friend’s pointed looks and hitting the golf ball below him. It was about to drop in the hole when a strong gust of wind blew it in the other direction. “Nothing about what you said was any nicer…” he mumbled under his breath.

“You can’t handle the truth, Bowen,” Kourtney chided, shaking her head slowly.

She shut her mouth as a new set of wide eyed customers appeared in front of the booth and plastered on her best customer service smile.

“Aha!” Big Red cheered, fishing the golf club out of the water triumphantly.

The customers that were just with Kourtney gave him weird looks, the Mother pushing her small kids forward hurriedly, mumbling something along the lines of _just ignore the strange man in the pond, honey._

Kourtney put her face in her hands and screamed, moaning out dramatically, “I can’t wait for the day y’all get me fired…”

“How do you think Gina’s gonna react when you tell her what happened?” Carlos wondered, hitting his ball past the fading purple Dragon statue with a tiara in its mouth.

Ricky shrugged. How the fuck was he supposed to know? (He knew. She would probably smack him across the arm and cackle at him while taunting, _“Took you long enough!”_ and wearing a shit eating grin. He was kind of glad she was out of town so he wouldn’t have to deal with that.)

“More importantly,” Kourtney piped up as Big Red stepped out of the dirty pond, gasping as he looked down to see his feet stained with green algae. “How do you think _Nini_ would react?”

Ricky groaned quietly, turning away from her so she wouldn’t see him roll his eyes. He hit the small orange golf ball a little harder than he meant to and it flew past the hole he was aiming for. Fuck Kourtney for always bringing that girl up.

At one point, they were a cute little group of friends. Carlos, Kourtney, Big Red, him...and Nini. In a small town full of people that all looked the same, they had gravitated towards each other; it’s not very hard to make friends when you’re a group of kindergartners. They had stuck with each other ever since; pool parties that ended with concussions from diving in the shallow end, days spent at the local library getting yelled at to be quiet by the old librarian named Betty (or was it the other one? They didn’t know. There were, like, three librarians named Betty in this town), and of course, sitting at the bar of the Inside Scoop and licking ice cream cones as Mr. Bowen served them with a bright smile.

They grew up together and grew into each other; none of them ever daring to leave each other’s sides because they knew they’d have no one else to get through living in Cape May with if they did.

That was, until Nini, of course.

Nini was a dreamer. She had goals and she always stuck to them; did what she needed to do to reach them. Ricky always admired her for her ambition, for her constant drive to be better and her need to fulfill her dreams. That’s why Ricky liked her in the first place. She inspired him; made him want to be a better version of himself, too. Made him feel like he could achieve anything he put his mind to. He fell in love with her and he thought she fell in love with him too.

But Nini was a dreamer and a dreamer cannot thrive in a town like Cape May. In a town like Cape May, you were trapped; in one direction was the ocean and in the other was the real world. You either got sucked into the rip tide of the sea water, flailing wildly and hoping upon all hope that someone would save you from drowning.

Or you walked in the opposite direction, away from the waves and toward the black asphalt of the road to the outside world. You got away from the gnawing edge of the sand and you ran and you didn’t look back because if you did, the shark in the water would pull you back into your old routine; holding you underwater by the leg and never letting go.

Nini chose the road. She moved away three years ago; got accepted to a performing arts conservatory in California and never looked back. Left their little group of friends to continue licking their melted ice cream cones while she soaked up the rays of the sunshine state and actually tried to become something of herself. She left Ricky in Cape May to become nothing.

He didn’t resent her for following her dreams. He was happy for her and wanted the best for her, always. But it was three years ago when his parents got divorced. It was three years ago when his mom moved to Chicago. It was three years ago when the psychiatrist diagnosed him with a mild form of combination type ADHD and generalized Anxiety Disorder. So three years ago, when Nini left: it kind of felt like everything was falling apart. She abandoned Ricky. Just like everyone in his life eventually did. She got on a plane and left him with a short hug and an _“I’m sorry it has to end like this. You’ll always be my best friend and I promise I’ll visit soon.”_

She came back to Cape May once, last summer. Ricky said he was sick and stayed home while the rest of them hung out. He didn’t regret it.

“Who the fuck cares what Nini thinks,” Ricky muttered bitterly. “Just because she’s my ex doesn’t mean I have to constantly think about her. I haven’t even seen her in three years.”

“She’s visiting in a week, you know that, right?” Big Red brought up hesitantly, looking at his best friend wearily.

“Well, I’m busy.”

“Doing what?” Carlos asked.

“Hanging out with my...friends.”

Kourtney snorted. “You don’t have any friends except us. So that means, you’re hanging out with _Nini_ because _we’re_ hanging out with Nini.”

“I hate you,” Ricky grumbled, clenching and unclenching his fist around the metal gold club in his hand.

Carlos patted him on the back gently. “Cute people don’t hold grudges, sweetheart. And EJ said you were cute. So think about it, at least.”

“ _Fine_. I’ll think about it,” Ricky agreed reluctantly.

He breathed in through his nose slowly and out through his mouth to ground himself, counting down from ten in his head before he swung his club and hit the ball towards the large grey castle at the end of the course. The orange ball missed the hole completely, hitting the small princess statuette that rested atop of the castle and knocking her into the polluted grey water of the pond.

*****

Ricky was bored.

He was _so_ bored.

Gina was still out of town and it was a Tuesday and the shop was always slow on Tuesdays, especially at the end of July.

He’d spent the past three hours serving only six customers and playing Fortnite on his phone which was _embarrassing_ but it was _fun_ , okay? But then his phone ran out of battery and he left his charger at home so now he was stuck sitting behind the cash register, resting his head on his hand and pulling at the loose threads of his itchy tweed shorts.

He was getting antsy at the dead silence of the shop; leg shaking incessantly and bottom lip on the verge of bleeding from how much he was biting it. Ricky made a mental note to suggest to his father that they get a sound system for the store so he wouldn’t have to be stuck listening to his own thoughts.

It had been a few days since his... _excursion_ with EJ at the beach and he hadn’t seen him since. Playing on his phone constantly made Ricky realize that he didn’t even have EJ’s number and they had just been meeting by the fate of the gods for the past few years. Weird how much you can learn about someone just from how often they come into your stupid ice cream shop.

Except that, EJ hadn’t come to the shop since the _excursion_ and yeah Ricky didn’t work yesterday so maybe he _did_ come and Ricky just wasn’t around to see. But that would imply that EJ actually came to the shop for the ice cream and not just to piss Ricky off with his flirting. And for some reason that thought disappointed Ricky.

He stared a hole through the tub of The Daily S'more ice cream in the freezer, thinking of what he would give to be taking a large scoop from the tub, topping it with Extra! Extra! Oreo Crumbles, and leaning over the metal counter to hand it to EJ, the older boy’s nimble fingers brushing Ricky’s own and leading to the strong veins of his golden, tan arms…

“God, could the service here get any worse?” a voice spoke up, pulling Ricky out of his daydream.

It just so happened that the voice _belonged_ to the subject of his daydream, EJ standing in front of the counter in his usual lifeguard gear, tiny red shorts clad over his thighs and slouchy backpack thrown over his shoulder.

Except it _wasn’t_ his usual lifeguard gear, because EJ was wearing a shirt. Except it _wasn’t_ just a shirt. It was a crop top. A goddamn _crop top_.

Ricky knew he probably looked so dumb; mouth open and eyes wide, fixated on the exposed skin of EJ’s midriff, his abs shiny with sunscreen. Worst of all was _the stupid fucking happy trail_ leading to his shorts that Ricky hated so much. (Ricky did, in actuality, love it.)

“Jesus Christ,” EJ muttered, waving a hand in front of Ricky’s blank eyes, forehead creased in concern. “I’m ‘bout to write the meanest Yelp review for this place…”

“Uh,” Ricky said eloquently, finally tearing his eyes away and looking the older boy in the eyes for the first time in days.

“Hi,” EJ stated, eyes softening as they met Ricky’s.

“Hi.”

EJ leaned his elbows on the counter as he asked awkwardly, “How are you?”

“Uh— I’m, like, good. Yeah, I’m good.”

Ricky wasn’t used to engaging in small talk with EJ and it was making him uncomfortable. With EJ it was always banter or die, basically.

“That’s good,” EJ replied, nodding slowly and playing with the small tip jar in front of the cash register.

“Yup.”

The older boy paused where he was spinning the glass jar, looking up at Ricky through his lashes. The way EJ was looking at him made him fidget in his spot; he picked at the latex gloves sticking to his hands, shifted his weight from foot to foot as EJ seemingly sized him up, and gulped as the older boy’s eyes drifted down to his lips.

“You want the usual?” Ricky piped up, voice abnormally higher than usual as his eyes caught the faded purple bruises splattered across the older boy’s neck. _I did that_.

EJ smirked, laughing under his breath as he finally leaned away from the younger boy. “Um, actually. Can I have a Paperboy Popsicle?”

“Oh. Yeah, sure. What flavor?” Ricky asked, opening up the freezer in the corner and waiting for a response.

“Cherry,” the older boy replied slowly.

Ricky reached into the freezer, grabbing the red ice pop and handing it to EJ over the counter. The older boy slid two dollar bills across the granite table top, eyes never leaving Ricky’s face as the younger boy rang up the cash register to get EJ’s change. Ricky concentrated on his task, counting the coins in his hand and looking up as he slid the change across to the older boy.

He froze however, when he faced EJ again, chocolate eyes meeting green ones and Ricky’s mouth once again dropping at the sight in front of him. EJ flattened his tongue against the cherry popsicle, licking a stripe up the cylindrical ice pop before swirling his tongue slowly around the tip of it.

Ricky gulped.

EJ’s eyes never left Ricky, half lidded as he wrapped his mouth around the frozen treat, staining his lips red. He pushed the pop into his mouth as far as it could go, hollowing his cheeks until the cherry popsicle disappeared, the only thing left of it being the wooden stick holding it and swiftly pulling the treat out of his mouth with a slick noise.

Ricky felt his stomach flip at the sight, heart beating faster in his chest as EJ’s tongue slipped out to lick his mouth, lips slick and glistening bright red.

“Mmm,” EJ hummed, giving small kitten licks to the tip of the popsicle, continuing to keep steady eye contact with Ricky. “I love the way it tastes.”

As if Ricky didn’t already hate the tweed shorts he was wearing enough, he cursed them further as they became tighter around his crotch. He didn’t realize he had begun leaning closer to EJ over the counter until the older boy brought his face just inches away from Ricky’s, continuing to mouth on the frozen ice pop in his hand.

“You know...I can tell the shop’s pretty slow today…” EJ drawled, breath hot where it ghosted over Ricky’s mouth. The tips of their noses brushed as he continued, “Maybe you should just lock up early and I can help you bring the... _inventory_ into the _freezer._ ”

Ricky’s eyes fluttered closed as EJ brought his mouth to the younger boy’s ear. “You look like you could use a hand…” the older boy slurred, making Ricky shudder.

“Or, you know...a _mouth_ ,” EJ whispered slowly, moving back to bring his mouth in front of Ricky’s, inching closer and closer until they finally–

“Ricky! Do you know where the mopping solution is?” his father asked, barging in through the door that led to the kitchen behind Ricky.

The two boys jumped away from each other, Ricky straightening up behind the counter and EJ almost falling off the barstool he was sitting on, half of his popsicle falling to the floor in a puddle of melted ice.

Mr. Bowen was not phased at all, smiling wide as he recognized EJ from across the counter. “Oh! Look who’s back and lifeguarding again! How ya doing, EJ?” he greeted cheerfully, reaching over the granite top to shake EJ’s hand as the older boy coughed violently, trying to pull himself together and reply to the man.

“I’m– _ahem_ –I’m good, Mr. Bowen! How are– _ahem_ –you?”

“Wonderful! Thanks for asking. You got a little cough there?” he asked, patting EJ on the back a little too hard. Ricky covered his face with his hands and screamed internally.

“I’m good,” EJ reassured awkwardly, giving Mr. Bowen a weak thumbs up.

The man looked out the window of the shop, scoping for any potential customers. When he found none, he headed back behind the counter and opened the cash register, counting the money. Ricky just stood behind him, still reeling from embarrassment as his red cheeks dissipated.

EJ was ready to get up, about to make a suggestion that he should probably get going until Mr. Bowen put his hands on hips and plastered another warm smile on his face.

“Have you eaten dinner yet, EJ?” the man asked.

The older boy’s brow creased in confusion and Ricky’s head whipped to look at his father, knowing what he was about to suggest. “Uh, no, Mr. Bowen. I haven’t?” EJ responded, a bit hesitant.

“First of all, please call me Mike.”

And if Ricky’s eyes popped out of his head, EJ pretended not to notice.

“Second of all,” his father continued and Ricky stared lasers into the back of his head, terrified at what he was about to say. “If you’re hungry, would you like to come over for dinner? I know you’re good friends with Ricky since he always talks about you and I’d love to get to know any of Ricky’s friends!”

And Ricky’s mouth dropped open in horror. He made eye contact with EJ who’s confused expression was quickly becoming smug, a smirk spreading across his face as he witnessed Ricky’s quiet struggle behind his father.

“Why, _Mike_ , I am so flattered to know that Ricky, dearest, tells you about me!” EJ beamed, bringing a hand to his heart.

Mike laughed, “He’s always going on about ‘the annoyingly attractive lifeguard that works across the street’ so I figured that must be you.”

Ricky held his face in his hands, shaking his head as EJ tried to suppress his laughter.

“So, you’ll join us tonight? I made pasta!” Mike exclaimed excitedly.

EJ pretended to consider seriously, ignoring Ricky gesturing to him behind his father and mouthing _NO NO FUCK NO DO NOT FUCKING SAY YES_ —

“Of course I’ll join you! I _love_ pasta,” the older boy replied with a charming smile, flashing Mr. Bowen his pearly whites.

Ricky gave up, deflating as his father patted him on the back, “Awesome! Ricky, close up the shop early and we can head back to the house with EJ.”

“Yeah,” the younger boy mumbled with a frown, snatching the itchy newsboy cap off his head, curls wild underneath.

EJ rose from his place at the bar and walked behind the counter to stand next to Ricky as Mr. Bowen began cleaning the store. Ricky sulked, arms crossing over his chest as EJ reached and ruffled the younger boy’s hair, messing up the brown ringlets even further.

“I fucking hate you.”

“That’s not what your dad said.”

*****

After changing out of his itchy newsboy uniform and opting for a pale yellow t-shirt and grey drawstring sweat shorts because he was lazy, Ricky sat with his legs crossed at the square kitchen table, face in his hands as he once again hid in embarrassment.

EJ, on the other hand, listened intently to Mr. Bowen’s account of the time Ricky peed his pants at age five at the top of the Wildwood Ferris Wheel. He looked between the father and son in amusement as he twirled his fork around the creamy garlic shrimp pasta that Mike had made for them.

“And then it started _dripping_ out of the cabin because he just wouldn’t stop peeing!” the man recounted, reveling in the embarrassment of his son. “He was so humiliated, he started crying. And then we had to deal with the top part of him being wet as well.”

“If you don’t stop speaking I’m going to start crying _again_ ,” Ricky wallowed in his seat.

EJ laughed maniacally as he witnessed the younger boy’s demise, “For the love of God, _please_ don’t stop, Mr. Bowen.”

“Nah, he’s had enough…for now. Let’s talk about you, EJ. And don’t forget you can call me Mike from now on!”

“Sorry, force of habit. What do you wanna know about me, Mike?” the older boy asked, stuffing pasta in his mouth and looking at the man curiously. Ricky finally unearthed himself from his embarrassment, leaning his elbows on the table and watching EJ as he began to eat.

“Well– let’s start with the basics, yeah? School, major, year, allat,” Mike inquired, taking a sip from the golden bottle of beer in front of him. 

Ricky’s eyes focused on the wet condensation on the glass of the bottle, little droplets of water dripping down the side of it slowly. He twirled his fork around his fingers distractedly as he listened to EJ speak. His father stood up straighter as EJ peaked his interest, describing life at Eastern Coast and explaining why he chose his major; about how excited he was to go back to campus for his sophomore year.

Hearing EJ talk about college made Ricky realize he still had no idea what he was doing; he had applied to schools, of course, and got accepted to a few, Eastern Coast being one of them. But the thought of change made him nauseous; so much in his life had changed already and he wasn’t sure he was ready for any more. He knew he was probably pushing it with the deadline extensions he asked for; it was already almost August, after all. But how was he supposed to decide what to do with his life when he was only 18? How could he be expected to know exactly what he wanted for his future when he could barely even get out of bed in the morning? When he had all these medications to keep track of? Think about his future when he quite literally tried to drown himself just three days ago?

Ricky’s ears rang, a sharp tone that pierced through his eardrums. He held the silver utensils in a tight grip as he stared blankly at his food, the marinated shrimp on his plate getting colder with every second that passed.

“Right, Ricky?” his father prodded, breaking him out of his trance.

He blinked. “What?”

“He was just telling me how you might go to Eastern Coast in the fall,” EJ said softly, face softening as he noticed Ricky’s tight expression. He tapped the younger boy’s foot lightly under the table with his own, resting gently against it. 

Ricky felt his shoulders relax at the touch and he took a deep breath before he spoke, clearing his throat. “Uh, yeah. They have a really good aquatic science program. I’m not really sure what I wanna... _do..._ yet. But I’m pretty interested in that kinda stuff. I guess.”

“What exactly is ‘ _that kinda stuff’_? I’m not really that familiar with aquatic science,” the older boy asked, eyes wide in genuine curiosity and foot absentmindedly caressing Ricky’s ankle. Something about it all made Ricky’s stomach flip.

“Well– I don’t know. I guess if I were to do anything with my life, I’d really– God, you’re gonna make fun of me for this –but I really wanna...save the turtles,” Ricky explained, anxiously waiting for EJ's reaction.

Instead of laughing like Ricky expected, however, EJ just tilted his head and asked, “Aren’t we already saving the turtles by converting to reusable straws and stuff, though? What more can you do to save them?”

Ricky snorted involuntarily, leaning forward on the kitchen table. His father sat back in his chair, taking a sip of his beer and mumbling something along the lines of _here he goes again_.

“ _First_ of all,” Ricky began, placing his utensils down on his plate a bit more aggressively than he meant to. “Turtles consume more plastic besides just straws. In fact, 52% of _all_ sea turtles have eaten some type of plastic. Which include, but are not limited to, plastic bags (which they mistake for jellyfish), fishing nets (which they think are seaweed), and unseen microplastics which can be found in everyday objects we don’t even stop to think about. With that being said, almost _all_ species of turtles are endangered, so _no_ we haven’t saved the turtles yet just because Starbucks decided to implement sippy cup caps.”

“And don't get me started on _ocean pollution_ ,” the younger boy continued, mouth moving a mile a minute and eyes wild as he explained to EJ, who was trying to suppress a smile as he listened to Ricky. “Only 12% of plastic is recycled in Australia! Literally every minute that goes by in this godforsaken world, a garbage truck full of plastic is dumped straight into the ocean. Think of all the natural habitats that are affected by all that waste! All the animals that are displaced from their homes because _someone_ decided to throw a Poland Spring bottle in the ocean instead of using a Hydro Flask like everyone else! Plastic is _killing_ the turtles and probably a shit ton of other animals right now too and if no one’s gonna do anything to stop it, then _I will!_ ”

Ricky sat forward at the edge of his seat, hands wide and fingers splayed as he finished his maniacal rant. Mike and EJ just stared at him with varying levels of fondness; the father had chugged his beer in the ensuing tangent, having heard it _many_ times before, while EJ rested his chin in his hand, a shy smirk on his face from watching Ricky talk about something he was passionate about.

The younger boy clenched and unclenched his fists as he tried to calm himself down, counting _one, two, three, four_ as he breathed in slowly and _five, six, seven, eight_ as he exhaled. He repeated the process as the two men in front of him sat in their seats patiently, the tension leaving his body as he finally relaxed.

“Well,” EJ piped up, twirling his fork around his pasta again and eyes never leaving Ricky. “ _I_ think you should go to ECU. For more reasons than the fact they have a good marine biology program or whatever.”

“Aquatic science.”

EJ rolled his eyes, but he was still smiling. “I said, _‘or whatever’_ , didn’t I? Anyway, go to ECU so we can hang out and I can listen to you rant about the turtles all day long.”

“Ew, why would I wanna hang out with you?” Ricky grimaced teasingly through a mouthful of pasta, having to hide his smile as he felt EJ hook his foot around his ankle under the table.

“Please, you know you love me!” the older boy joked back, sticking a shrimp in his mouth and getting in Ricky’s face as the boy screamed at him to get away.

Mike just watched the boys over the brim of his drink with a knowing smile, laughing as Ricky threw a piece of pasta in EJ’s direction. He glanced over at his son and saw a bright smile spreading across Ricky’s face, eyes crinkled as he looked at the older boy from across the table. Mike hadn’t seen Ricky smile like that in a long time.

*****

The smile on Ricky’s face didn’t last long, however.

He sat on one end of the old couch in the living room, curled up in a ball and burrowing his face into a throw pillow to once again hide in embarrassment as his father sat with EJ on the other side of the couch and showed the older boy his _baby pictures._

“And _this_ one is from his third birthday where he begged us to get Big Bird from Sesame Street to come to his party and when we _did_ get a guy dressed as Big Bird, Ricky got so scared that he cried for the rest of the day and wouldn’t separate from his mom to even blow out his candles,” Mike recalled, wiping tears from his eyes as he laughed at the memory.

“God, that is just _so. darn. cute_ ,” EJ said with a straight face as Ricky looked at him in disdain.

Mr. Bowen turned the page of the scrapbook that sat open in his and EJ’s lap, smiling as he saw one of his favorite pictures. The photo showed a young Ricky, about five or six years old, at the beach with a wide grin on his face with his two front teeth missing and eyes squinty in the sun. A woman wearing Ray Bans was crouched behind him, arms wrapped around Ricky in a tight embrace and resting her chin on his shoulder as she smiled at the camera alongside him.

She was young and beautiful and carefree; you couldn’t see the glint in her eyes behind her sunglasses, but from the crinkles from her smile showed how happy she was. Her hair was dark like black coffee with hints of sun kissed golden strands, flowing in the sea salt wind. Her smile was wide and full of life, full of all the happiness you could ever want to see in a person. She was the sun shining on a stormy afternoon, the rainbow coloring the clouds after a day full of rough showers.

“Who’s that?” EJ asked, pointing at the picture. Ricky stretched his neck to get a better look at the photo from where he was sitting a foot away from the other men on the couch.

Mike hesitated as Ricky scooted closer to EJ before responding, “That’s Lynne, Ricky’s mom.”

At the mention of his mother’s name, Ricky tensed, muscles taught and jaw clenched. _Shut up. Shut up shut up shut up shut up._

“She’s so pretty,” EJ commented, unaware of the younger boy’s sudden discomfort. “Ricky looks just like her.”

“They do look similar, don’t they? I guess that’s where he got his good looks,” Mr. Bowen chuckled.

_Shut up. I’m nothing like her. Shut up shut up shut up. I don’t want to be anything like her. Stop it shut up stop please stop stop stop._

“Where is she anyway? Is she at work or something?” the older boy asked innocently, not knowing the family’s situation. He turned to look at Ricky with a soft smile but his expression dropped as he finally noticed the other boy’s change in demeanor. 

Ricky sat with his back stick straight, arms wrapped around the throw pillow he was holding in a tight grip. His heart had begun beating at a brutal pace inside his ribcage, breath coming out in quick puffs and a sharp pain beginning to spread through his chest. He picked at the loose thread of a hole that was beginning to form in the pillow absentmindedly, muscles fidgeting and eyes blinking rapidly as the intrusive thoughts began filling his brain.

_Why couldn’t they have just shut up. Why couldn’t they have just stopped talking. I wish my stupid dad didn’t take out that stupid scrapbook. I wish he didn’t make EJ look at those stupid pictures. Why did she have to leave? If she was so happy in that photo why did she leave me? I hate her. I hate her for leaving me in this shitty town. Fuck her fuck her fuck her fuck this I can’t fucking do this anymore fuck this fuck everything fuck–_

“Ricky?” EJ asked timidly, bringing the younger boy back to the real world.

He glanced at EJ and his father from the corner of his eye, the two of them sharing apprehensive expressions, EJ’s in particular in concern.

Ricky coughed, voice coming out shaky and small, “Yeah I–. I’m just _–_. I’m gonna go outside.”

Without another word, he quickly left the living room, ignoring the calls after him and heading out the front door. He found solace on the porch swing in front of the house, an old thing with faded green painted onto the old wood and rain stained cushions covering it. Ricky liked to sit there on late summer nights when his bedroom would become too claustrophobic, swinging back and forth slowly while watching the stars. That old porch swing had comforted him through many things in his life: he sat there for hours the day his mom left for Chicago; curled in a ball and cried in fetal position the night Nini flew to California; slept on the itchy cushions the night he was diagnosed with ADHD.

It was once again comforting him, pulling him away from the overbearing thoughts that constantly permeated his brain when he was inside his house and providing one small, safe space that he didn’t have to worry about anything. He wrapped his arms around himself and rested his chin on his knees, practicing the box breathing technique his therapist taught him to calm himself down.

After a few minutes, his heart rate finally began to slow down to a normal pace and he relaxed into the old cushions, rocking back and forth slowly on the swing. He sat quietly, picking at a loose thread until he heard the sound of the front door opening next to him.

Ricky sighed heavily, not looking at the door. “Dad, can you please just leave me alone for a few minutes…”

“Damn, first dinner with your family and you’re calling me Daddy already?” EJ smirked gently, hands in his pockets as he moved to sit next to Ricky on the swing.

The younger boy rolled his eyes, pulling his arms around himself tighter. “God, do you ever have something to say that isn’t annoying as fuck?”

“Yeah, I do actually,” EJ began, resting his arm across the back of the bench. He gently placed his hand on Ricky’s shoulder, absentmindedly stroking the bone with his thumb. “I’m sorry for bringing up your mom. Your dad told me everything that happened…”

Ricky took a deep breath before replying, “It’s...okay. You obviously didn’t know so. It’s fine.”

“Yeah, that kinda made me realize that...we’ve known each other for so many years but we don’t really, like, know each other that well. Like, we’ve never really _talked_ , you know? Well, except for that night on the beach a few days ago but we did a little bit more than _talk_ ,” EJ stated nonchalantly, making the younger boy blush.

“Anyway,” the lifeguard continued. “We banter and talk shit but we don’t know much about each other. Like, the personal stuff, you know?”

“Okay...so what’s your point?” Ricky wondered.

EJ moved closer to him on the swing, placing his hand around Ricky’s ankles and bringing them into his lap as he crowded into the younger boy’s space. Ricky eyed him cautiously but didn’t move away, subconsciously leaning into his touch.

“I wanna get to know you more. Like, what’s your favorite movie? Are you allergic to anything? Do you have good music taste? All that shit,” EJ said.

Ricky gave him a weird look, not used to EJ being...nice to him. It was bizarre seeing the older boy without a condescending smirk on his face, but the way EJ was looking at him with genuine eyes and stroking the sharp bone of his ankle softly was kind of making his heart flutter so he didn’t do anything to stop it.

“Okay...um. My favorite movie is, don’t judge me, _13 Going On 30_. I’m allergic to eggplants and walnuts and uhhh. I guess I have a good music taste? But I also listen to 100 gecs unironically so that could be arguable.”

EJ just stared at him before snorting. “100 gecs? Really?”

“I think they’re visionaries for the music industry,” Ricky said seriously.

“Oh God…” EJ laughed, shaking his head. He looked down as he absentmindedly played with the puka shell anklet that Ricky wore and hummed in interest. “This is cute. Where’d you get it?”

“You just love bringing up painful memories, don’t you…” Ricky joked under his breath, rubbing his tired eyes.

“Sorry?” EJ cringed, still fingering the piece of jewelry.

Ricky explained, “It was my mom’s. My dad gave it to her on their first date and then she gave it to me. She said when I was a baby I couldn’t keep my hands off it, so...yeah. She didn’t ask for it back when she left and even though I kind of hate her I like having this little piece of her with me everywhere I go.”

He looked back up at EJ, eyes squinted as the bright rays of the lowering sun got into his eyes. EJ took a second to take the sight of the younger boy in, committing it to memory. His faintly sun kissed skin glowed gold in the sunset, soft freckles spattered across his nose and cheeks. The soft tinges of honey in Ricky’s brown eyes gleamed as the sun hit them, the shadows of his long lashes spreading over his cheekbones. EJ couldn’t look away.

“Can I kiss you?” the older boy blurted out quietly making Ricky’s eyes go wide.

“What?”

EJ bit his lip nervously, rambling, “I’m sorry it’s just _–_ you look so good right now and honestly I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a while, especially when you were talking about those stupid turtles when we were eating dinner. But obviously I couldn’t kiss you because your dad was right then so I’m not just gonna kiss you like that in front of you dad because that would be weird. And I wanted to kiss you that night on the beach but then obviously we got interrupted by Mazzara and then I thought we were finally gonna kiss back there at the shop when I was being a little shit but then you _dad_ interrupted us which was awkward and right now the sun hit you in this way and you just looked, like, I don’t know, beautiful? So I’d really like to kiss you _now_ , if that’s okay _–”_

Ricky cut him off, grabbing EJ by the cheeks and placing his lips on the older boy’s in a soft kiss. The older boy tensed in surprise for just a second before relaxing into it, hand moving from where it was rested on the back of the porch swing to cup Ricky’s cheek gently as they melded against each other. Ricky sighed and EJ took the opportunity to run his tongue against the younger boy’s bottom lip, his mouth opening up to let the older boy in. Their kiss deepened and Ricky was breathless as EJ’s hand moved to twist his fingers into the soft curls at the back of his head, making Ricky hum as he pulled lightly. 

His heart beat hard in his chest and Ricky felt something spread through his body that he hadn’t felt in a long time and that was something the younger boy really liked about EJ: he made him _feel_ something. Made him forget about all the bad stuff around him, made him forget that he was on the verge of a panic attack just a few minutes ago, made him forget about the anxiety that came with talking about his family.

Ricky bit EJ’s bottom lip, pulling it and causing the older boy to moan softly. EJ leaned his head, deepening their kiss even further and Ricky thought he was about to melt right then and there until _–_

The boys separated, hearing a loud knocking on the window behind them, Mr. Bowen behind the glass looking at them with his eyebrows raised. Ricky shut his eyes in embarrassment and the man laughed, shaking his head and walking away from the window, leaving them be.

“God, we just can’t stop being interrupted, can we?” EJ chuckled, still stroking the hairs at the back of Ricky’s head lightly with a goofy smile on his face.

Ricky rolled his eyes instead of responding, going back in for one more soft kiss before leaning back.

The boys smiled at each other stupidly before EJ spoke up again, “So what’s your favorite video game?”

“You’re gonna hate me but I love Animal Crossing,” Ricky confessed softly, leaning into EJ’s hand where it held him.

“Ugh, so you have bad taste in _everything_?” the older boy teased.

Ricky punched him on the shoulder but stayed smiling. “Heyyy, it’s very relaxing and therapeutic to me…”

EJ laughed at him and they proceeded to get into a conversation about their favorite characters, favorite foods, favorite everything. It could’ve been a few minutes or a few hours, they didn’t know nor cared as they sun began setting fully, golden rays melting into pinks and purples and eventually the darkest shade of midnight blue. They talked and they talked; about everything and nothing all at the same time.

They stayed close together on the porch swing, eyes never leaving each other for a second.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry this isnt sky high but not that sorry bc im mentally ill, bitches xx <3  
> 
> 
> [look at the fic moodboard here!](https://pin.it/6MRBYhP)  
> [listen to the spotify playlist inspired by this series!](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0k9dkMT4OpTE0Lq4UK31Yr?si=yewGP6h-TFy0ZIaa2HBf6g)
> 
> BE MY FRIEND!  
> [tumblr](https://magentaful.tumblr.com/)  
> 


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